Purpose Archives - Chantal Breytenbach Coaching

Do you find it hard to be who you are…?

“It is easier to try to be better than you are, than to be who you are.” – This quote by Marian Woodman struck me. So often we treat ourselves like self-improvement projects, thinking that if we could only be better than we are, then everything would be the way we want it to be. If we could achieve that elusive level of perfection, then we would finally be happy, and have all the love, joy, and abundance we are craving…

At least, I know this was true for me. I started working with my coach, with the hope that it would help me figure out what was wrong with me, and that I could then fix myself. My coach was unwilling to participate in that experiment, and she kept treating me as if there was nothing wrong with me. I was baffled.

And now, seven years later, I get it. None of us are broken. We are simply disconnected from our true nature. We have allowed for so much conditioning to settle into our minds, hearts, and even bodies, that we have completely forgotten who we are… […]

What is driving your desire for more?

Posted on March 25, 2026By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Courage / Future Self / Goals / Gratitude / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Integrity / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Mindfulness / Mindset / Passion / Perfection Detox / Purpose / Thinking / Thriving

In my most recent article I talked about the drive to do more, and I questioned the desire for abundance. This may have left the impression with you that I’m saying that wanting more is bad. And that is not what I’m saying at all.

Over the past three years, I have discovered that there are two kinds of desire for more… […]

What is the opposite of scarcity?

Posted on March 25, 2026By ChantalPosted in Courage / Failure / Fear / Gratitude / Grit / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Life / Meaning / Mindset / Perfection Detox / Purpose / Resilience / Slow down / Thinking / Thriving

In a conversation with a client who is in the exploration of her own thriving, she mentioned how, in her incessant drive for more, she often mistakes momentum for meaning. And this is a symptom of living in a manic world driven by a scarcity mindset… Robert Holden calls this our destination addiction.

When we believe that there is not enough, that we are not enough, or that we will not have enough, we also inevitably believe that more is better, and we start to think that the whole point of life is to keep chasing more until we arrive at the ever-elusive destination where we finally “have it all”.

Lynne Twist reasons this is how we keep the scarcity mindset alive. We have been conditioned to focus on what we lack, not on what we already have. When we pay attention to what we lack, we inevitably believe that more is always better, and we act as if there is simply no other way to be in the world. This is just how it is. What we don’t see, is how we then trap ourselves on a hamster wheel that we can never escape… […]

What to do when you feel overwhelmed – Take 10…

Posted on March 23, 2026By ChantalPosted in Compassion / Connection / Courage / Emotional Agility / Failure / Fear / Future Self / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Integrity / Leadership / Life / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perfection Detox / Purpose / Resilience / Self-care / Slow down / Thriving

I’m not someone who tends to write about the steps you need to take to overcome something, or fix something, and today I want to talk about something Alison Armstrong shared that landed and resonated deeply. And it’s directly connected to our willingness to let ourselves grow, stretch, and ultimately thrive… So, I hope you will indulge me in sharing with you what you could do if you are currently feeling overwhelmed. […]

Will you leave a legacy of surviving or thriving?

Posted on March 15, 2026By ChantalPosted in Commitment / Compassion / Failure / Fear / Future Self / Gratitude / Grief / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Love / Meaning / Purpose / Story Matters / Thriving / Transformation

When I was completing my master’s degree, our professor would always talk about living your dash – which was perhaps a not so elegant way to talk about how we choose to spend the time between our date of birth and our date of death.

Today marks the one-year anniversary of my father’s passing, and it has me thinking about how he lived his dash, and how all of us live our dashes. […]

What season of Life are you in right now?

Posted on January 14, 2026By ChantalPosted in Bias for action / Commitment / Completions / Courage / Decision-Making / Dreaming / Future Self / Goals / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Mindfulness / Perspective / Planning / Purpose / Slow down / Thinking / Thriving / Time management / Transformation / Values

The other day at my son’s Hip Hop class some of the other moms were discussing camps they were booking for their children for Summer. Summer?! It’s January. We are still in Winter. I laughed a little at their urgency around needing to get their Summer camps booked now. This event left me with two thoughts… […]

You won’t get it all done. And that is good news…

Posted on January 8, 2026By ChantalPosted in Commitment / Goals / Gratitude / Happiness / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perspective / Planning / Purpose / Slow down / Thinking / Thriving / Time management / Values

I know most New Year’s articles often start with a note of excitement and anticipation about the new possibilities ahead. I would like to start my first article of 2026 on a more sobering note. You might find it depressing, and yet, I want to invite you to consider that perhaps it’s not. Perhaps it’s the key to your liberation this year.

On the first day back to school from the holiday break, I was talking to the father of one of the kids in my son’s Kindergarten class while we were waiting for them to be dismissed for the day. I asked him how the holidays were for him, and as per usual, I got the response I seem to get a lot from people: “Busy”. How often do you find yourself responding to a question on how you are with the that one word, “busy”?

What was even more interesting, was when I asked this father what he was most excited about in the coming year, he said he didn’t know yet, because he hadn’t had a chance to catch up on emails. He shared that once he has caught up with everything he is behind on, he will have a better sense of what he wants to do this year. And this is how most of us run our lives. When… Then…

We play this endless When… Then… game with ourselves, without recognizing the three most important truths that will set you free from this endless hamster wheel… […]

A year in the rear-view mirror

Posted on November 17, 2025By ChantalPosted in Completions / Courage / Emotional Agility / Failure / Fear / Future Self / Goals / Gratitude / Grief / Grit / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Integrity / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perspective / Purpose / Self-care / Slow down / Story Matters

At the end of each year, I complete a Year-End Review. I spend time looking back at the year in granular form. I go and look at one month and one week at a time. What am I looking for? I look at what was happening both personally and professionally. I look at my calendar and my business tracking to see who I was serving, where I was travelling to, and what felt important during each moment in time. I reflect on how I felt, and how I was relating to all that was occurring. Why do I do this?

I complete this detailed Year-End Review every year, because it gives me the opportunity to reflect on my life from a zoomed-out perspective with new knowledge that I didn’t have at the time that the events were occurring. It often has me change my perspective on the story I tell myself about the year I just had. And it ensures that I tell myself the truth instead of just holding on to a story… […]

The Truth about Perfectionism

Posted on August 6, 2025By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Celebrations / Commitment / Compassion / Courage / Emotional Agility / Failure / Fear / Goals / Gratitude / Grief / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Integrity / Leadership / Life / Love / Meaning / Mindfulness / Mindset / Passion / Perspective / Purpose / Resilience / Slow down / Story Matters / Thriving

In April of this year, I did a thing. With the gentle nudging of my coach, I participated in a professional rebranding photo shoot. The photo shoot took place in the midst of tremendous grief and sorrow. I was still reeling from the shock of my father’s passing. If I’m being honest, I’m still reeling from it now. There are days where the grief of it is so intense that my heart physically aches, and the tears have a valve of their own that cannot be turned off…

And yet, the photos are more real, more authentic, more true than any photos I have ever taken. They reflect someone who is more grounded, more present, more connected to herself, Life, and others. They reflect who I am without any filters or pretense. They are raw and real. They are vulnerable. They are beautiful.

This photo shoot in April was not some spur of the moment, spontaneous event. It was part of a much larger agreement with my coach to start to see myself more clearly, to claim the value of the work that I do, and to realign my brand to clearly reflect that. It was part of a project called “Seeing Myself”.

Why am I sharing this with you, and what does seeing myself have to do with the title of this article? Everything really. When we slow it down… […]

What do you believe to be true about you?

Posted on June 15, 2025By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Commitment / Compassion / Courage / Failure / Fear / Gratitude / Grief / In the muck / Inspiration / Integrity / Leadership / Life / Love / Meaning / Mindset / Perspective / Purpose / Resilience / Story Matters / Thinking / Thriving / Transformation

My father died believing he was a failure. From his perspective, he had failed, because he had been unable to secure full-time employment after losing his job during the pandemic. He lost his house and had almost no money when he died. He based a lot of his self worth on external measures of success, and he believed that he did not measure up. However, that’s now what I saw or believed… […]