slow down Archives - Chantal Breytenbach Coaching

Can a flat tire give you a headache?

I’m currently listening to Life Loves You by Louise Hay and Robert Holden and in Chapter 3 of the book Robert Holden shares about a talk he once attended on the mind where the presenter posed the question: “Can a flat tire really give you a headache?” The reasoning was that you might complain about getting a flat tire, and you might even feel like you have a serious headache after having to deal with replacing a flat tire, but is it really the flat tire that is giving you the headache? The only way the flat tire can be responsible for your headache, is if the tire came off, bounced, ricocheted, and hit you in the head. What is really giving you the headache when you need to replace a flat tire, is your thinking about the flat tire… […]

Appreciate and acknowledge the phase of life you are in

Posted on January 29, 2024By ChantalPosted in Celebrations / Completions / Courage / Dreaming / Failure / Future Self / Goals / Happiness / In the muck / Inspiration / Life / Perspective / Planning / Purpose / Slow down / Thinking / Thriving

Often this time of year, there are lots of posts on social media about big goals and kicking the year off with a strong start. Many of those messages contain a subtle (or not so subtle) tone of “if you’re not all in and ready to go, there’s something wrong with you”. And yet, you might find yourself in a place where you are not sure you are all ready to go.

These messages are not accurate. Not everyone is excited at the start of a new year. And nor do you need to be, because let’s be honest, New Year’s Day, is just another day in the year, like any other, and nothing significantly changes between one minute before midnight on December 31st and one minute after midnight on January 1st… […]

Why it serves you to slow down at the Beginning of a New Year

Posted on January 17, 2024By ChantalPosted in Celebrations / Commitment / Completions / Dreaming / Failure / Future Self / Goals / Gratitude / Happiness / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Mindfulness / Perspective / Planning / Slow down / Thinking

This past weekend, I led a workshop for 19 people called “Creating 2024 with Intention”. These 19 individuals made the conscious and brave choice to slow down, take stock of what had transpired in their lives in 2023, and really become intentional about who they want to become in 2024 and what experiences they would like to be having this year.

The New Year often evokes within most of us the need to set new year’s resolutions. It’s an invitation to start anew with a clean slate. And it’s been my experience that so often people are so eager to move forward, that they don’t take the time to slow down, turn around, and look back to where they had come from… […]

Rest is part of the work. It’s not the reward for hard work.

Posted on December 17, 2023By ChantalPosted in Happiness / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Mindfulness / Purpose / Self-care / Slow down / Thriving

There are two times of year that I find quite intriguing. The one is just before the Summer holidays and the other is just before the Winter break for Xmas and New Year’s. People tend to get into a frenzy to “wrap everything up” or “get everything done” before they “take a break”. And some people treat their “break” as a “to do” item on their to-do list. My sense is that this is a symptom of the society we live in – a world that is always on and always on the go. I firmly believe that we are not built for speed. Human beings are not meant to be moving at the pace that we are moving in this world right now. Here is why… […]

What “finishing strong” really means

Posted on November 27, 2023By ChantalPosted in Bias for action / Commitment / Completions / Courage / Dreaming / Goals / Grit / In the muck / Integrity / Leadership / Life / Mindset / Planning / Purpose / Resilience / Self-care / Slow down

As I write this, Christmas is exactly 30 days away. And the New Year is 37 days away. Something that tends to be a popular topic of conversation – or perhaps I experience it that way because I’m a coach – is how will you finish the year strong? I’m a big fan of finishing the year strong. I’m not someone who stops before reaching the finish line. And, just like with the concept of Christmas, the concept of “finishing strong” might hold different meanings for different people… […]

Are you taking in the room or simply rushing for the door?

Posted on August 22, 2023By ChantalPosted in Connection / In the muck / Life / Listening / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perspective / Slow down / Thinking / Time management

The other day my daughter asked me why I set timers for myself throughout the day. I set alarms that remind me when it’s time to leave for an appointment, or when it’s almost time for a client call. I do this so that I don’t have to keep watching the clock. I find constantly watching the clock takes me out of the moment and that is not helpful for my intention to be fully present IN the moment. So, I have alarms that remind me of the time. That lessens my mental load, and allows me to simply BE in the moment and enjoy the moment, because I don’t have to worry about missing a call.

And of course, with the wisdom and brilliance of a 6-year-old, my daughter shared her insights from what she understood about why I have alarms that go off throughout the day… […]

What is rest anyway?

Posted on May 22, 2023By ChantalPosted in Goals / Leadership / Life / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perspective / Purpose / Self-care / Slow down / Time management

In a recent article I spoke about unhealthy striving. I pointed out that we live in a society of high-achieving, high-producing, chronically tired and burnt-out individuals. I shared how often we wear a lack of sleep as a badge of honour. People often pride themselves on how little sleep they are getting and how much they are getting done, without realising that “functioning” on only a few hours of sleep per night, is equivalent to driving under the influence of alcohol.

However, have you ever tried to fix a persistent lack of energy by sleeping more only to sleep and still wake up feeling exhausted? The reason for this is that sleep and rest are NOT the same thing. We tend to incorrectly assume that to rest means to sleep. Yet sleep is but ONE form or rest.

So, in the spirit of truly slowing down to take stock, I want to talk about rest… […]

Striving, yet not thriving

Posted on May 2, 2023By ChantalPosted in Bias for action / Coaching / Commitment / Failure / Future Self / Goals / Grit / In the muck / Leadership / Life / Mindset / Passion / Perspective / Purpose / Resilience / Self-care / Slow down / Thinking / Thriving

Recently, I posed the question, can you handle the effort shock? And there was quite a reaction to that article. So, today, I want to speak to those of us (myself included) who tend to overdo it and who tend to not know where the line is between effort and burnout. […]

It starts with gratitude…

Posted on April 26, 2021By ChantalPosted in Gratitude / Happiness / Life / Mindset / Perspective / Slow down

In December of 2017, my little family and I immigrated from South Africa to Canada. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. To get myself through my first year in a foreign country, I accepted a gratitude challenge from a friend. I reasoned that “forcing” myself to find something I’m grateful for every day for a year would help me focus on what is good in my life, instead of on what is “wrong” with my life. I committed to sharing a daily gratitude post on Facebook. Somehow sharing it publicly made it more real, and I felt accountable to continue the practice every day. There were some hard days where I really felt I wanted to give up the practice. Having made the commitment to share a daily post about what I’m grateful for however, meant I would continue to honour my commitment to myself.

365 days of gratitude turned out to be the most transformational thing I could have done that year. […]

Embracing the Winter of the Mind

Posted on January 31, 2021By ChantalPosted in Gratitude / Happiness / Life / Meaning / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perspective / Resilience / Slow down / Transformation

All my years living in South Africa, I had complained about cold winters. It wasn’t until I moved to Canada that I realised that your perception of what a cold winter is, depends very much on where you live in the world. Experiencing the winters here in Canada made me realise that it was never really that cold in South Africa. It just felt that way, because what I had been used to was extreme, dry heat in summer. So, consequently the switchover to cooler weather felt dramatic. Compared to the weather in Canada, the average winter’s day in South Africa feels about the same as the average spring day in Canada. In fact, sometimes winter in South Africa is warmer than spring here in Canada.

It also wasn’t until I lived in Canada that I understood how cold and darkness can affect your mood. I had heard about Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), but I wasn’t always sure if it was real, or whether people were just using the weather as an excuse to be unproductive. I had underestimated what a lack of sunshine can do to your psyche. […]