life Archives - Page 6 of 9 - Chantal Breytenbach Coaching

Slow down and turn around: Honouring Completions

The New Year often evokes within most of us the need to set new year’s resolutions. It’s an invitation to start anew with a clean slate. And it’s been my experience that so often people are so eager to move forward, that they don’t take the time to slow down, turn around, and look back to where they had come from.

At the end of last year, I wrote about the value of celebrations and why I think it’s important to choose to celebrate our successes and milestones. My thoughts here are an extension of the discussion on celebrations because I also believe there is value in truly honouring completions… […]

Will you be inviting the P Twins over for dinner this holiday?

Posted on December 21, 2022By ChantalPosted in Celebrations / Life / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perfection Detox / Perspective / Planning / Purpose / Slow down

Recently a client shared with me how stressful she finds the holidays. I invited her to tell me more and she shared that she tends to go into overdrive during the holidays. She wants everything to be perfect, and that usually means that she refuses to accept any help. She also finds that she turns into a control freak and people tend to avoid being around her when she is preparing for the holidays.

We slowed it down and I asked her what has her feeling so stressed and pushing so hard. She said, “unrealistic expectations of perfection”. I asked her who is placing these expectations upon her. My client is very self-aware, so she immediately recognised that she was placing these expectations on herself. No-one else was asking her to do all the things she commits herself to doing during the holiday season. She was doing this to herself… […]

What does it mean to celebrate?

Posted on December 10, 2022By ChantalPosted in Gratitude / Happiness / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Mindset / Perfection Detox / Slow down / Thriving / Values1 Comment

As the holiday season approaches, life has brought me some interesting experiences that has me contemplating the value of celebration. The dictionary defines a celebration as “the action of marking one’s pleasure at an important event or occasion by engaging in enjoyable, typically social, activity.” And this time of year, tends to open people up to celebration for various reasons. Whether you are celebrating Christmas, Hanukkah, New Year’s, or anything in between, this time of year is mostly an invitation to celebrate.

And that got me thinking about my relationship to celebration… […]

Living Large: A tribute to Jeremy Mansfield

Posted on November 28, 2022By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Bias for action / Commitment / Compassion / Courage / In the muck / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Mindset / Passion / Purpose

A few weeks ago, I wrote about taking up more space and what that might look like. Today I want to talk about a real-life example of that. Back home in South Africa, Jeremy Mansfield was a radio announcer and television presenter. He passed away recently from cancer. To me he was a living example of what it looks like when someone takes up more space. […]

I AM: The two most powerful words in the world

Posted on October 24, 2022By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Bias for action / Commitment / Compassion / Connection / Courage / Decision-Making / Goals / Gratitude / Grit / Happiness / Inspiration / Leadership / Life1 Comment

My commitment to changing the level at which I live my life, deepened about four years ago when I decided to embark on the biggest personal transformation of my life. And the most important thing about personal growth and transformation, is that you never arrive. There is never a point of completion. The deeper you go, the more you start to value and appreciate the journey. You fall in love with the process, because you realise that’s all there is.

So, as I write this, I’ve renewed my commitment to being 100% committed to the process and 0% committed to the outcome. I cannot control the outcome. So, there is no point on focusing my energy and attention there. I won’t get me what I yearn for most anyway. So, instead, I fall in love with the process of learning and growing, and I stay on the path towards mastery. I choose to be a student of life and I accept and embrace never arriving. For the rest of my days here on earth, I am a student of life, and I am here to soak up as much love, learning, joy, growth, awe, and inspiration as is available to me.

These renewed commitments stem directly from my attendance at a Game Changer Event with the ultimate mindset coach, Devon Bandison… […]

Larger Than Life

Posted on October 11, 2022By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Courage / Happiness / Inspiration / Leadership / Life / Meaning / Perspective / Thinking / Values

One of my favourite TED Talks is a talk by Caroline McHugh on The Art of Being Yourself. I share it with all my clients at some point, because of the power of her message, which is essentially an invitation to take up the space the universe intended for you.

What does it even mean to take up space? Most of us play small. We hold on to limiting beliefs that has us playing out the same patterns over and over, and we allow fear to stop us from stepping out of those patterns. We tell ourselves stories about what we are capable of and what we are not, and we believe our own stories. We let other people tell us what should matter to us, what our priorities should be, and we spend our lives in fear of the question, “What will people think?” And very often that thought stops us from taking action on the things we value. […]

Morning Routines

Posted on September 6, 2022By ChantalPosted in Commitment / Goals / Happiness / Leadership / Life / Mindfulness / Mindset / Perspective / Planning / Purpose / Self-care / Thriving / Time management

I recently read an interesting article by Sarah K. Peck, a fellow coach and mompreneur, where she questioned the value of morning routines. She highlighted how morning routines have become very popular. These days many famous and successful people attribute their success to a solid morning routine. However, does your morning routine really support you in who you want to become? […]

Living in the Now

Posted on August 23, 2022By ChantalPosted in Happiness / Life / Meaning / Mindfulness / Slow down

Three years ago, I read the book Slowing Down to the Speed of Life for the first time, and it changed my life. Before stumbling upon this beautiful book, I had been searching for ways to slow down my mental chatter, and to become more present.

My search for presence started back in 2008 when I discovered Eckhart Tolle. I devoured all his books and audio recordings, desperately seeking to tame my ego mind, and find ways to really live more fully in the present moment. And there were times when I was able to do that, but it always felt like it was only attainable in short bursts. I had to work at it, and only a few specific things helped me stay present… […]

Reflections on love and belonging

Posted on July 24, 2022By ChantalPosted in Compassion / Connection / Happiness / Inspiration / Life / Love / Meaning / Values

During my second year in Canada, just before I decided to become a coach, I had a conversation with a coach about life purpose. In the coaching model she was trained in, they were taught to narrow down your life purpose to ONE word that summarises what you are all about or what you are trying to create in your lifetime. A one-word life purpose sounded absurd to me. Could you really narrow it down to just one word? And of course, I was surprised when she shared what she thought my life purpose was. She observed that it sounded like mine was connection. I’ve discovered two things since then… […]

Redefining Compassion

Posted on July 5, 2022By ChantalPosted in Authenticity / Compassion / Courage / Emotional Agility / In the muck / Leadership / Life / Love / Meaning / Mindfulness / Values

During a specific phase of my PhD research, I conducted interviews with participants. One of the questions I would ask interviewees was, “What does compassion mean to you?” I would then follow up that question with a second question, “How do you demonstrate compassion in your own life?”

The aim was to get a sense of what compassion really means to people and how they live compassion in their daily lives. The Oxford Dictionary defines compassion as, “sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.”

For me personally, that definition feels too narrow. It invites us to feel pity or concern for someone. It evokes within us this sense of feeling sorry for someone about what they are going through. And yet, pity falls short of what is needed. It simply levels compassion akin to sympathy, when my sense is that what is really needed is far more than just feeling sorry for someone. […]