Happiness Archives - Page 8 of 8 - Chantal Breytenbach Coaching

Our Search for Meaning

Ever wonder why you have that constant urge for something more in your life and career? That elusive job, that something bigger than yourself, or that special relationship that will give your life more meaning? Something that will motivate you to greater heights and make you a happier person? What drives these urges?

Perhaps a real-life story will provide some insight into this intriguing question. One of my heroes, is a man called Viktor Frankl. Given my background in psychology and organisational behaviour, I’m deeply familiar with theories of motivation that try to explain behaviour and motivation through the idea that we are striving to get different needs satisfied. However, Frankl convinced me that we have overlooked one of the most powerful needs that it at the core of all human behaviour – the need for meaning. […]

Off the Beaten Path

Posted on April 11, 2020By ChantalPosted in Courage / Gratitude / Happiness / In the muck / Life / Mindset / Thinking

As a Six on the Enneagram (i.e. Loyal Sceptic, Devil’s Advocate and Protector-Warrior), I tend to stress easily. And I worry a lot. I’ve been a high-strung person for most of my life. Part of my hyper-vigilance is probably as a direct result of growing up in a violent and dangerous home as well as living in a violent and dangerous country. Finding ways to survive when your safety and security are often threatened, has a direct impact on how your personality evolves. As a child and young adult, I would often hide my anxiety, fear, concern, worry (and sometimes sheer dread and panic) under an exterior of bravado. I would jump into challenges and face them head-on, ignoring the gnawing fear in my gut. […]

Lessons from the womb

Posted on March 28, 2020By ChantalPosted in Gratitude / Happiness / Life / Mindset / Slow down

In the early months of pregnancy, there is so much that you wonder and worry about. Will the baby be healthy? Is it a boy or a girl? Is the baby moving? What are my birthing options? Do we need to start thinking about names? The list goes on. Amidst a global pandemic you have even more items of worry to add to your list. Will it be safe to have the baby in hospital? Will I have support during the birth? Am I at risk of getting sick? Will the baby get sick?

While you are fretting and making plans on the outside; anticipating everything that could go wrong and everything you need to plan for – a baby room, clothes, maternity or newborn photos etc. – the little being inside you is happily going about his/her biggest job, which is to grow. Inside the womb, oblivious to all that is happening in the outside world, this little person is doing the one thing that he/she can do – growing and evolving, going about the business of being alive. It takes no effort, it simply is. With no outside influence, your baby has no preconceived ideas or expectations. Your baby is not comparing him/herself to another baby or worried about how much or how little progress he/she is making. They are simply doing what they feel compelled by nature to do – grow. […]

The gift in slowing down: Reduce stress and access your innate mental health

Posted on March 27, 2020By ChantalPosted in Decision-Making / Happiness / In the muck / Mindset / Slow down / Thinking

Since reading Slowing Down to the Speed of Life: How to create a more peaceful, simpler life from the inside out, I have a different perspective on stress and mental health. As I explained in a previous post, Richard Carlson and Joseph Baily define true mental health as the ability to engage in free-flow thinking. They reason that we all have the capacity for positive mental health, but that as adults we are socialised into the busy mindsets of Western culture and then we become serious, analytical, stressed, depressed and unimaginative. Beginning at age five or six, and then steadily progressing into adulthood, our mental health keeps declining.

However, we have a natural ability to recover our mental health. It’s only because we lack the understanding of how our thinking works, that we feel unable to recover our mental health. Slowing down to the speed of life allows us to notice aspects of life that were previously hidden in the frenzy of a busy mind. Beneath the vicissitudes of thought, lies a spaciousness, a peacefulness of being that is incomprehensible to a mind caught in analytical thinking. When our minds aren’t racing from one thing to the next, we can gain access to our innate mental health. It’s always there. We can’t actually lose it. We just need to be willing to let go of our insistence on spinning our wheels in analytical thinking mode. […]

Slowing down to the speed of life

Posted on March 24, 2020By ChantalPosted in Happiness / Slow down / Thinking

I recently read Slowing Down to the Speed of Life: How to create a more peaceful, simpler life from the inside out and became acquainted with the idea of slowing down your thinking to the pace of life with the intention of reducing stress and experiencing more joy in your life. For the most striking example of living naturally in the moment, just look at young children. They are full of life, running around and playing with their friends. They turn from one activity to the next with endless enthusiasm. Games of hide-and-seek become an opportunity for unlimited imagination, exploration and curiosity. They don’t get bored or tired of being in the moment. Most children have enormous amounts of energy and are unconditionally loving. They make adults envy their innocent and uncontaminated approach to life. […]

The Value of Stoic Principles in Times of Crisis

Posted on March 20, 2020By ChantalPosted in Happiness

We find ourselves in trying times. It is difficult to not let the global sense of panic and dread seep into my bones as I read the news or look at the latest COVID-19 statistics. I’m saddened by what this global pandemic will mean in terms of lives lost, families torn apart, and the long-term impact of a global economic downturn that is predicted to be worse than the global financial crisis of 2008. We have no idea how long this pandemic will continue or where it will end, but there seems to be no point in wallowing in all that is broken and that could go wrong.

I’m remined of a book on Stoic principles I read last year, entitled A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy. I found that a refresher of some of the principles discussed in The Guide to a Good Life can really serve in figuring out the best way to be during these unprecedented times. […]

Slow Down to Speed Up

Posted on February 8, 2020By ChantalPosted in Gratitude / Happiness / In the muck / Slow down

A few years ago, I worked for an executive search firm. My boss used to tell me often “slow down to speed up”. At the time, I don’t think I really understood what he meant by that. Ever since I can remember, I’ve always rushed to the next thing and the next thing. It was a key theme of my life – chasing the next thing; and never pausing long enough to celebrate, take in, or notice what was happening in the now.

When I was doing my master’s, I embarked on a spiritual journey to discover the power of now. And even though I had brief moments of being present, I still inevitably got caught in the cycle of running from one thing to the next. Then, at the end of 2017, we immigrated to Canada and suddenly everything I knew, loved and sometimes took for granted, fell away in an instant. I was faced with the uncertainty of what lay ahead with no clear plan on how I would “chase the next thing”. I was forced to slow down and to really look at my life. And it was hard. […]

Don’t major in the minor things

Posted on February 5, 2020By ChantalPosted in Gratitude / Happiness2 Comments

I recently finished reading David Bach’s book Start Late and Finish Rich where he discussed the key principles for achieving financial independence at any age. What was surprising about the book though, was the last few chapters on richer living that talks not about money, but about finding meaning and purpose in your day-to-day life.

Bach rightly states that so many people put off joy and fun to retirement; telling themselves that when they retire, they will have time to have fun or to experience joy and to do the things they want to do. The reality is that most retirees experience retirement as a shock. In fact, most executives die within the first five years of retirement. Why? […]